Moving Forward

Well now that I know what the plan is it was time for lots more tests. I had an EKG and echocardiogram to check my heart. Some of the drugs can damage the heart so they like to look before chemo starts. I then had a pet scan to check that nothing had spread to other parts of the body, then an MRI of the breast to have better images.

I then had another biopsy for the study as they needed 4 samples, now that all the tests were done it was now time to randomise me for the trial. The computer basically decides what arm of the study you'll be on. I was so hoping for the B arm as the drug avastin has been found to be promising in late stage cancers. I was however randomised to arm 1c. 

So what does all that mean. Well I will be on 4 different IV chemo drugs. On the first day of each cycle I will receive docetaxel and gemcitabine, then I will receive the gemcitabine alone a week after the first dose. This will happen once every 21 days for 4 cycles. (The gemcitabine is the study drug to see if its better than the usual combination)After the 4 cycles are complete I will do the second round of drugs adriamycin and cyclophosamide every 21 days for 4 cycles. After the 6 months of chemo it will be time for surgery. 

Things are moving so fast really don't have time to think too much, call it denial if you want.I really wanted to wait and start all this after I came back from my friends wedding in Costa Rica, however the Dr said no, he had wanted to start the following week. So I am starting chemo bright and early Monday am.

Dr visit

Saw Dr link June 5th and we sat and talked about diagnosis and treatment plans.I have a large 6cm tumor that has spread to the lymph nodes. It was staged as a stage 3. Breast cancer has 4 stages, 4th being the worst. He did say I have a fast growing aggressive tumor that usually responds well to chemo so that is the plan attack it hard and fast. Kill that sucker.

It was a good visit because now I could at least move forward. I was offered the opportunity to be a part of a research  study looking at a newer drug and also looking at different combinations of drugs. The goal is to have a complete response to chemo before surgery. So now that I had a plan and I had already decided to be a guinea pig it was now time to get the word out and tell family, friends and co-workers.

Wow, telling my family my diagnosis was probably the worst thing I've ever had to do, hearing their reactions and pain was heartbreaking and it just got harder the more phone calls I made. I let the word spread at work so that now it is out in the open. Everyone has been wonderful and soooo supportive so that has been a positive.

As for me I'm still rather numb, still can't believe it's me I'm talking about. I really don't sit and dwell on it however, and I truly believe I will beat this and be cured with no recurrence. I have to believe that as I have a beautiful daughter who needs me. I know the next few months are going to be tough as the Dr told me. Bring it on.

How did I get to this point

 As most of you now know I was recently diagnosed with breast cancer. I thought I would use this forum to write a little about what is going on in order to keep you all informed, so here goes.

Over the last few months I noticed the shape of my right breast had changed slightly, like a small depression quarter sized, nothing drastic, nothing to worry about or be concerned about. I did my usual exams never felt a lump and I was already scheduled for my routine physical with Dr Ryan. I brought it to her attention, she did her usual exam and never felt anything, so I went ahead and scheduled my annual mammogram. If it wasn't for Dawn Marie nagging me to get it scheduled I would have probably waited a lot longer to do it. However I did schedule it for 4 weeks later and had arranged to meet Dawn Marie for lunch after it was done as she also had appointments all day. I had the boob squishing done and the mammographer stated I had calcifications, ok, no big deal, I knew I had dense boobs, just like my brain at times and certainly now. So I then proceeded with ultrasound and then she said I just need to have the Dr review it. I was totally oblivious, in la la land I guess, so the Dr said you have a suspicious lump. Oh! we need to do a biopsy. When a Dr asks for a 10 guage and 14 guage needle and wants to poke your boobs with it, just say oh shit! So that was that, I had the biopsy done and she told me she was 98% sure I had breast cancer and gave me a book about breast cancer. I thanked her and walked out numb, not a tear shed until I saw Dawn Marie, then the water works started.

The next day I was called by  Dr Ryan to say the biopsy was positive and I had a high grade aggressive tumor. I really still didn't believe it, I am young (ok I'm not 20) healthy, active, hard working and no family history of cancer. I then went about scheduling appointments so that I could figure out plan. I, at that point told my daughter and a few good friends. Otherwise I wanted to keep it under wraps until I knew what was happening. Work was a god send because at least I could focus on something else, so I carried on as normal putting a face on and not really thinking too much. By this time I was well read and informed and was just really looking forward to seeing oncologist and a getting plan of care.